The hood called parent

Processed with VSCO with t1 presetThere’s a fine line as parents, that we teeter when it comes to giving our kids the things we wish we had as children. At least, my husband and I have that struggle. Growing up, my parents worked hard just to provide the basic things for my siblings and I, and while we weren’t on government assistance like my husband and his siblings, it was still a struggle for my parents to make sure a meal wasn’t missed.

I still remember the different places we lived, starting when I was five years old, and back then in my innocence, I didn’t know that we were “poor” in US standards. You don’t know you’re “poor” until you’re old enough to understand why you need a job and how money works… at least not back when we were kids. I think kids today know way too much, way too young but that’s a story for another day!

While I wished to have all the Barbie’s and the accessories that come along with them, my parents would simply say, “maybe one day, but not today.” My parents were stern and strict parents, however, I know that they really did wish to give my siblings and me certain things that we’d ask for; be it for our birthdays or holidays, and there were times that we would get one special wish list item and it’d light up our year!

I remember one year my mom told us that we could start a savings jar for a trip to Disney one day, and for years we’d put any and all spare change into that jar. However, every time it filled up, something needed fixing and there went that dream. We’d start over and over and over. In the meantime, we’d go on weekend trips to the beach and that made us so happy, it still does lol. I love the beach and I hold lots of great memories of vacations there as a kid! (I just wish Sam loved it as much as me and we’d be there more than just 2 days a year! lol)

Finally, when I was 15 years old, my parents surprised me with a trip to Disney World (at this point my brother had gone off to the Navy), so it was a special birthday trip for me. I know how much hard work and saving up my parents had to do to take me and for that I am so thankful!

Fast forward  13 years and my husband and I have taken our girls to Disney World since they were infants. We will be there in a month from now and I just can’t help but think that they won’t feel the same excitement that I felt when they’re 15 years old… or maybe they will, who knows? time will tell…When what felt like my whole life, that was one of the things I wanted the most… of course what so many kids dream of, meeting those two cute big-eared mice!

That’s our struggle, we want them to know and appreciate what hard work looks like and that they are blessed to have the life they have. The fact that they won’t know the struggle we knew; I am so thankful for that! I’m thankful that they will not grow up in a house with financial struggle, not very many people get to see that or know that. I’m thankful that God blesses us day after day, year after year and I know that we are only where we are by His grace, love and mercy over us!

My prayer is that we teach our girls to be thankful for everything. To not be spoiled, though I want to spoil them. I put into practice telling them “no” already when they ask for things. I tell them that they can’t always get what they want, but will always have what they need…even at their little ages of 3 and 1. I don’t want to give them everything just because we can spare the extra expense, it’s a struggle, but important.

One of the things that God constantly reminds me of is being a good steward. A good steward financially, spiritually, physically and a good steward of the two most precious little lives He’s entrusted us with! Oh, they are my heart and even through the ups and downs of parenting, I know that God’s purpose and plan for their lives is something out of this world! I know that they will be world changers and a light. They’re forces to be reckoned with and He’s given us the task to make sure that they’re led through the right path.

I’m constantly praying for God to give me the wisdom and knowledge to be the mother  that they need me to be and I don’t want to let Him down and I don’t want to let them down. I know that at times I will, however, through God and with God we can move mountains!

Daily, I pray for Him to be my portion, to give me patience, to give me wisdom in disciplining them, in teaching them and loving them. Parenting isn’t easy, it isn’t always fun, but in teaching them we also learn and grow along with them. Hopefully, that line becomes easier to balance as we continue in the journey of parenthood!

Don’t Be Cheap

F3364ADC-F000-4854-9E87-3F2C91C6752A.jpgI’m sure we’ve all heard the expression, “talk is cheap.”  And it’s so true! Talk really is cheap, we can say a lot of things  but never really follow through with our actions.

I’ll be the first to say that there are times when I say I’ll do something and I don’t actually do it. I pull out every excuse in the book as to why.

I’ll use my kids as an excuse. “I’m tired.” “I don’t have time.” “I already made plans.” “I won’t do well at it, so why bother?”  And the list can go on and on.

Am I the only one? Yes… no… maybe?

Anyway, this year both my husband and I have really tried to be more intentional with what we say we want to do. Since we’ve been married, every December we sit down and write out our goals for the following year and talk about the goals we had for the ending year. What did/didn’t we accomplish and if we didn’t let’s add it to next year’s list and get it done…or at least try to.

For the first few years, we would check off somethings but others would be left unchecked and added again to next year in hopes that maybe this time we would actually do it! We’d say: “ok, well let’s keep that in our goals to accomplish, but let’s really do it this time!”

One of the goals that we’d talk about every year but could never seem to check off, had to do with getting in shape. We would start the year off right, but one or two months into it, we’d give up, kind of eat healthy-ish and go to the gym or work out like twice a week, then complain come summer that we’re unhappy with our physique. This happened for about two years straight!

Finally, in September/October of 2014, we mustered up courage, put on our game faces, found motivation and really started doing the thing! We both hit our fitness goals hard and about 6 months later, we did it! We accomplished our fitness goals and we did a hypothetical happy dance.

About a month into me being at my goal, I found out I was pregnant with our second daughter. *So, for most of us, being pregnant = turning into little miss piggy! haha I swore to myself I wouldn’t let myself get too crazy, and for the most part I did really well, but it’s the last month of pregnancy that gets me! That’s where I gained 30 more pounds!!*         -Oh my gosh, actually typing that out is crazy!-

Also, for most men, it’s hard to stay motivated and fit when your wife’s pregnant and wants poboys, donuts, beignets and ice cream all the time, so I kind of brought him down with me! (I’M SORRY, I’M TERRIBLE)! We entered into a schlump again (is that how you spell schlump)? Is it even a word? oh well… Anyway, we ended 2015 and had to hit the reset button and we’d been on and off all of 2016 with getting fit again.

So, here we are halfway through 2017 and one of our goals again, is our health and fitness. (which by the way, we are sticking to it and getting it done again, yay)! We found motivation through famous fitness bloggers/youtubers, motivational speakers, successful and well known entrepreneurs and a couple of our friends, to really put our best foot forward and change not just our physical selves but our way of thinking as well.

Sam and I have always wanted to be successful and excel at the things we put our minds and hearts to, whether those things work out or not, we could at least say “hey, we gave it our best shot and TRIED. We didn’t just talk the talk, but we walked the walk.”

Throughout our marriage, there have been lots of things that I personally have started and stopped, be it because of lack of motivation, self-doubt, or just plain excuses. I don’t want my words to be cheap… I want to follow through and get stuff done. We both have lots of exciting projects going on with our music and with my writing and we are walking in obedience to the Lord with the songs and words He’s placed in our hearts. We’ll see where they land us and keep striving to be the best version of ourselves and teach our daughters how to work hard and follow through with goals, talents and dreams.

I hope that you’ve found encouragement and go for those goals you’ve been putting off. Don’t be “cheap…” get them done and in the words of Nike, “JUST DO IT!” Surround yourself with people that encourage you and motivate you to accomplish your goals.