I really miss blogging, even though I’m new to this, and have only posted a few blogs, I miss it. I really find it relaxing to write what’s on my mind, how I’m feeling, and things I’m currently or have gone through in the past. I believe my second or third blog post was about how I wasn’t ready to let Ava sleep in her own room, and at four months, I’m still NOT READY! I didn’t think it would be so hard for me to do this! Before I had her, Sam and I had a game plan of how we were going to “sleep train” her and that we’d only have her sleeping in our room for the first 2 months… blah blah blah! I just love her so much and I love having her sleep next to me. It gives me a sense of peace. So, she’s four months now and she has started developing her personality a little bit (I love it). This past week, she’s been giving me trouble for bed time. When it’s approaching, I change her into her pjs, I feed her, and she’ll usually fall asleep while she’s still at the breast. I pull her away and bring her to my shoulder for a few minutes, and I would then bring her to our room and lay her down in her bassinet. That has worked up until recently. Now, when I go to place her in her bassinet, she immediately wakes up. It isn’t until the third try that she doesn’t wake up. Some might say that I should leave her in her bassinet and she’ll fall right back asleep, but I just feel the need to hold her and pat her back to sleep. But I feel like she may be getting a little to used to it, like she’s catching on that mommy will pick her up the moment she makes a peep. I don’t want her to get spoiled in this way, so tonight, I’m trying something new. She fell asleep after her feeding, and I did the usual routine. She woke up, I picked her up, repeated, she woke up again, I picked her up. So, I decided to try again with the nunie at bed time. She really doesn’t like the thing, but why not try to see if she’ll use it to soothe herself to sleep. I can tell you right now, that the experiment is failing as she is currently crying haha… We are first time parents, so I figure we should do trial and error with her sleep routine to find what works best. And I want what’s best for my little princess! So, we’ll see how this whole thing works out!
My little princess is 3 months today! I cannot believe how much she’s grown in such a short time and how she’s reaching milestones. She just brings so much joy to our hearts. In honor of her 3 month birthday, I want to share a letter that I wrote to her when she was 1 month.
My dearest Ava,
Words cannot begin to express just how much I love you. Though we’ve only known each other for a month, I already love you enough for a hundred lifetimes! Every day is a new adventure with you as I learn what each sound is and when you start to get hungry, are about to cry, or you just want to be held. I’m not going to lie, it has been a struggle at times to be patient in learning you and learning how to be a better mom every day. Sometimes I feel like I’m not doing a good job, but I’m quickly reminded that through struggles I grow and we grow together. It is a learning experience, that I would never trade! Not to mention how amazing daddy is at being such a great support and constantly reminding me that I am doing a great job. Also, how amazing God is and how faithful and gracious he has been. Not a day goes by that I don’t thank God for blessing us with you and bc you’re a healthy, beautiful and sweet baby girl. You have already made such an impact in our lives and I can’t wait to see you grow and impact others. My prayer for you is that you will be a leader and a light to those around you. I know that God already has great plans for you and I can’t wait to see you flourish into an amazing woman of God! I want you to know that no matter what, I will always be here for you, I will always love you, I will listen to you and encourage you. My arms will always be open for hugs, and my heart for sharing. But for now, as you continue to grow and develop your personality and reach your milestones, I will take each moment in because I don’t want to miss a beat! I love you to the moon and back my sweet Ava Berlyn!
With all my love,