Sleep

I’ve been thinking that the time is coming for Ava to sleep in her crib. At her 2 month check-up, her doctor suggested that we should do it sooner rather than later because it may get harder the longer we wait. I just don’t think I’m ready! I love having her sleep next to us in her bassinet. I’m trying to prepare myself mentally and emotionally… I think I may have separation anxiety… Anyway, I wrote this in my notes the other night when we made our first attempt at having Ava sleep in her room:

I totally failed. Tonight, I thought Ava would be sleeping in her crib, in her nursery that I spent so much time trying to make dainty and beautiful for her. Well, that didn’t happen. I checked on her one more time, and Sam and I were off to bed. The monitors were on, and on full volume so I wouldn’t be able to miss even the littlest peep from her. We prayed and Sam told me not to worry, that she was going to be just fine and that I needed to stop staring and listening intently to the monitor. Slowly, I began to close my eyes but I couldn’t let myself fall asleep. I knew I wasn’t going to sleep if Ava wasn’t in her bassinet next to our bed, so I caved. Sam was already snoring, so I woke him up and told him I couldn’t do it. I asked if it was ok to get her, and like the sweet and understanding hubby he is, he said yes. She was perfectly fine in her crib, sleeping like an angel, but it was me. I couldn’t do it, I wasn’t ready!! I kind of hesitated whether or not I should bring her back to our room, but I decided to get her anyway. Forget what the doctor, parenting books, and other parents say… Haha…Right? She’s my daughter…. I know it probably won’t get any easier, but she is our first. (Who am I kidding?! I’m a wimp!) This mommy business takes a toll on my emotions, and I’m already an over emotional human!  So now it’s almost midnight and here I am sitting in my bed with Ava in my arms. I didn’t think I’d be one of those clingy moms, but I guess I am… Pray for me…

2 Replies to “Sleep”

  1. I started napping Piper in her crib at almost 2 months but wasn’t ready to let her sleep in it all night even though she was sleeping for 8 – 10 hours already. We ended up purchasing a baby monitor with the camera/video monitor and it completely eased my mind. She has been in her crib from a little over 2 months now 🙂

    1. That’s awesome! She’s still not sleeping through the night yet. I’m hoping it’ll happen soon though. We did purchase some monitors, but I think I’m just being a baby ha! I will try again soon!

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